You know she’s going to be adorable, but what else does a bride need to understand about the little girl behind the basket? Below is a list of ten important flower girl facts so the two of you can enjoy a special and stress-free time together.
1. Flower girls do best when they are between ages 4-8.
You will do best if your flower girl is between that ages of 4 and 8. They will be old enough to understand instructions, but still young enough to generate a collective “awwww” among your guests. It may be difficult for you to fight the urge to ask an irresistible 2 or 3 year old to be in your wedding, but resist. They are simply too unpredictable and require too much adult supervision. You can have a flower girl who’s nine or ten (after all, they’re so cute, too!), but at this age she may prefer to be called a junior bridesmaid.
2. Flower girls love being flower girls.
Little girls understand that it’s a huge honor to be asked to be in a wedding. You can make the experience even more special for your flower girl by asking her in a special way. Consider giving her a thoughtful gift like o, a card, or even a personalized poem. In the months leading up to the wedding, be sure to build a bond with your flower girl by scheduling an outing or a meal just for the two of you, or by chatting with her on the phone or through video on Skype if she lives far away.
3. Flower girls attend showers and the rehearsal.
Flower girls are part of the wedding party. It’s traditional to invite them to any showers or other pre-wedding events (except, of course, the bachelorette party!). It’s also important to include the flower girl in the rehearsal. Familiarity with place and procedures will make her feel more comfortable and ready for her grand performance at the wedding.
4. Flower girls grow.
When picking out the dress for your flower girl, keep in mind how quickly children grow. A dress that fits your flower girl in December might be too small by the following June. It’s a good idea to consult with the girl’s parents on sizing, fabric sensitivities and other dress details. You may choose to let the parents pick out the dress for you. Give them ideas for length and color and then send them off shopping. Customarily her parents will pay for the dress too.
5. Flower girls don’t have to sprinkle rose petals.
Some places might not allow rose petals to be dropped, or you might have a different vision of what you’d like your flower girl to do – the options are endless! Your flower girl can hand flowers to guests as she makes her way down the aisle. Or she can hold a pomander or a bouquet. She can even blow bubbles. If you don’t have a ring bearer, she could also carry the rings. Have fun and be creative!
6. Flower girls aren’t perfect.
Even a flower girl who breezes through the rehearsal and seems outgoing and prepared might have difficulty fullfilling her duties when faced with a room full of guests. So it’s a good idea to be prepared for imperfection. Your wedding will be wonderful whether or not the flower girl makes it down the aisle. Those little goofs can often make the event all the more memorable.
7. Flower girls need adult supervision (and the adult shouldn’t be you!)
On your wedding day, you don’t want to be Super Nanny. Before the ceremony, make sure your flower girl’s parents, or other trusted adults, are there to watch her and any other children in the wedding party. At the ceremony, keep the flower girl’s parents in her sight, seated in one of the front rows, and near the center aisle. Once she travels down the aisle, she can sit with them during the ceremony. Or, if you prefer that the flower girl stand, designate one of your bridesmaids to look after her.
8. Flower girls can be picky.
At the reception, your five-year-old wedding attendant may go looking for the kid’s menu when the pan-seared salmon is served. If the entrée isn’t a kid favorite, it’s a good idea to order a special reception meal (aka macaroni and cheese) for her. You can check with the girl’s parents to see if her favorite dish is available.
9. Flower girls can wilt.
When scheduling the wedding day and reception, consider your flower girl’s age, temperament and bedtime. If you have a reception that goes well into the evening, don’t expect too much from the flower girl. Chances are, she’ll tire out early from all the excitement. If possible, arrange to have a sitter watch and play with the flower girl and other children at the reception. The sitter can even take the kids to a separate room to watch a video or play games while the adults celebrate with you.
10. Flower girls can be your friends for life!
When you look back at your wedding day, you’ll have many magical memories. So will your flower girl. By including her in your special day, you have initiated a bond that can last a lifetime. And who knows – one day she might ask one of your children to be in her wedding.